She replied irritatingly “So what? Now you have a problem with that also?”
“No, I don’t have any problem”,I don’t like her irritating tone.
I paused took a long breath and said “I am just trying to understand why anyone wants to upload his own picture in facebook”
Again with the same tone she replied “What’s there to understand? I clicked one pic. I liked it, so I uploaded it.”
I promptly said “So, you expect your friends to see and appreciate your looks and put ‘likes’ or may be comment something on it”
She replied “No, it’s not like that. If someone likes it, it’s fine. But it’s not expecting something”
I asked again “Then what it is? Why do you need appreciation from someone? I have not changed my profile picture since the time I joined facebook. For me it’s just a medium to be in touch with friends. I don’t need their comments on how I look. I don’t need their appreciation on my looks. But you are different. Every now and then you upload pictures, especially your selfies. I still don’t get it why anyone does it”
Her irritation got severe “You are a bore. It’s simple. We just do it. There is nothing much to think about it. The world does not work like you. I like my friends. I put comment or ‘like’ when they upload picture. And I also upload picture, it’s just pure fun. It’s not complex like the way you think. And of course I like it when people appreciate or way something on my pic”
“That’s what I am saying”, I smiled and said “So you do expect that. Have you ever thought why do you need appreciation from others? Is it because you are insecure and you don’t believe in yourself? Do you need appreciation of your looks? Will that make you feel better and more confident?”
“Oh c’mon. It is not that complex. And why do we need to think so much for just uploading a picture in FB. It’s just cool. Why don’t you think differently? Maybe you are insecure. May be you feel that people don’t like to see your face. May be you feel that you are not good enough. If you believe in yourself in so much then what’s wrong in just sharing your beautiful and happy moments with people who like you and want to be a part of your world?” She became serious with her comments
“No, it’s not like that”, she forced me to be on defensive now “How many friends you have in FB”
“Nearly 360 or something. Why?” she asked
“I am sure not all of them are your close friends. Why would I like to share my so called happy moments with them” I enquired
“So what if they see it. Who cares? I don’t. Even if someone doesn’t put a comment or ‘like’, it’s okay. I just feel good when I see myself or I upload a pic. You don’t love yourself and you don’t like to see yourself also. No wonder you don’t have not taken your picture since the last 5-6 years. You just hate yourself” she smiled naughtily
I didn’t said anything. Is she right? I realized I have not taken selfies for the last 5-6 years, do I really hate myself? Is the FB really a medium to make oneself feel good?
I never felt the need to upload my own picture in different styles in FB. I never felt that I need appreciation from people on how I look. I don’t even want to share my happy or sad moments in a open forum like FB. My emotions are not for display. I don’t want to show to the world that I am happy or sad on a particular day.
But then – Who’s perspective are right – hers or mine ? Or there is something more to it ?